I’m always curious about womanhood and our relationships in life . I think I’ve narrowed down motherhood to be similar across most cultures.  The love, the sacrifices, and everything in between. So when I visited Doha Qatar this summer, I sought out  establishments ran by women  while my beloved gravitated to the heavily saturated, male-dominated havens.

Although there were very few women establishments, I found them, and as I tried on some attires with my daughter, we got to talking about life with these arab women.
They were equally fascinated by my role as an African woman and I was more than happy to share. It came to no surprise the things I found out about these culturally different women;
They are driven and ambitious, just like us. They have dreams that go beyond childbearing and rearing.
They hold their older women in high esteem, their advice is paramount to any other. This got me excited as I looked forward to the hours I was about to spend with my grandmother, the matriarch of my family.
They do consider slippers or sandals bathroom/ house attire, this had me reconsidering my fashion sense.
Under those hijabs are beautifully made up women who take care of their appearance, hence the many facial cleansers that I purchased and yet to try out.
I have to say, they are less overworked, unlike most of us, myself included. Work is regarded as a means of basic support as long as it doesn’t infringe on family time..aaah, if only my bills spoke this language, I’d be home free.
No, girls do not casually make eye contact or chat-up men…back in the day, growing up in africa, this was the rule too, but I’m afraid we’ve deviated from that in pursuit of “what men can do, women can too”. Not sure if that’s a good thing entirely.
Of course you know I asked about men..and they had no qualms about proclaiming the role of men in their lives. Interesting how there was no shame in admitting that they adored their men and held them in high regard. Why? In one of the women’s words “because why not, that is your man, your protector, your provider, the one you create more family with” . As the rest nodded in agreement, I was left questioning when I had stopped regarding my beloved with such prestige, had I ever? was it because I worked just as he did and we were both providers?. In my quest to be and remain an independent woman had I forgotten how to be just that,.. a woman?.., and bask in the protection of my beloved.
Of course I’m very aware that we live in very different worlds and our realities are quite different but I was encouraged by how easily these women embraced and enjoyed their roles without making it a chore. I envied the assurance with which they spoke of their world versus my worries of the future if my world was to change suddenly.
I don’t know if I’ll ever meet any one of them again but I know that our tea time was life changing. If anything, it taught me to be comfortable with my role in life because who I am doesn’t threaten who you are. There’s enough space for all of us to be exactly who we’re meant to be.

Shukran…Afromomma says.